34 [M4F] – Illinois/US Hi, I’m datingishard_! You may remember me from such R4R posts as “Hi, I’m datingishard_! You may remember me from such R4R posts as” or “Looking for the Biden to my Obama” or “Halt! Or my heart might stop beating!

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Here’s what /u/datingishard_ has to say about it:

– I am poly, I am dating someone lovely and I am not looking for a unicorn. We date seperately. There. Let the amount of responses get reduced 95% fold.

Ah, R4R. Here we are again. It has been some time but much like that consistent ache you have, it never truly goes away. I'm going to cheat a little and copy and paste my last post here a few months ago but before then, I did want to state: Thank you for everyone that messaged and upvoted me! You are all gems. Every single one of you.

I've been around the R4R block for a bit, ladies and gentlefolk. A few years at least and I've sent hundreds of messages and received hundreds more. I've spoken to throwaways, main accounts, regulars, catfishers and dudes pretending to be women. Or dudes pretending to have a girlfriend th~~~~at wanted to talk to me. But only through them. Yeah.

Anyway, I thought I'd give a shoutout to all the wonderful, great ladies I've had the pleasure of chatting with and enjoying the company of over the years on R4R, no matter how brief that time was.

So, here's to you, ladies who provided sparkling, interesting conversation, who were upfront and honest with me about their intentions, who were comfortable with being who they are and never apologized for it, who never faded or ghosted but told me straight up they were not interested, who had been hurt in the past but were working hard to get back to a good place. Here is to all of the women who kept putting themselves out there, and trust me, it is hard out there at times. Who continued to proceed, despite the rampant unsolicited pictures, request for scantily clad images and "what's your kik?" messages from the slavering hordes here. Who put thought and effort into their messages instead of writing a single line (because, let us be honest, all you need to do is put F4M and you can literally write anything you want and your inbox will blow up). Who put their flaws out there for all of us to view. Who were not afraid to put their viewpoints in text, potentially opening themselves up for personal attacks. To all the regulars that I have conversed with here, who continue to look for something, no matter what it is. Who gave it a shot and for whatever reason, we didn't work out. Who accepted with grace and dignity when I said I wasn't interested. For all the kind words and praise you gave me in regards to my writing, post and myself.

I could go on and on but I think you get the gist.

There is a flipside. I think I'll borrow something from Kanye West and address that(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bm5iA4Zupek). So, this is for you, the ghosters and faders, the liars and emotionally vampiric ones. To all the ones who were in relationships or marriages and looking for something on the side without their significant others knowing. To all the ones desperately seeking attention but not being upfront about their intentions. To the catfishers, the liars and the fakes. To the strange dudes who wanted to know what I would do to their wife/girlfriend etc. No dude. I'm not interested. To the flakes, the overly obnoxious and brash who don't believe in tact. This is to you. Please leave me alone.

There. I feel like that sums it up. And hey, if you're interested in knowing more about me or what I'm about, feel free to refer to my previous R4R that is still up https://www.reddit.com/r/r4r/comments/97uupw/33_m4f_chicagous_looking_for_the_biden_to_my/

I'm still looking for a connection with someone. A spark. A certain je ne sais pas. I'm still here and I'm still confident I'll find something. Or maybe multiple somethings. Life is all about trying new things and experiences. Who knows?

I'm not giving up and neither should you!

And I'm a year older than I was too! That is important.

submitted by /u/datingishard_ to r/r4r
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